From Pound Cake To Princess

A Rockabilly tale of a high school outcast who finally gets sweet revenge at her 10 year reunion.


Verse One

I’m at my Ten year High School Reunion,
On my third Long Island Ice Tea.
I used to be the Quarterback Prom King,
Now I’m bald with a big pot belly.
I spot this dance floor hottie,
Movin’ like a sleek Maserati.
Lordy, that’s ol’ Pound Cake with the legs and the ass!
She used to be the fattest girl in our Class!
When she was rotund we used to make so much fun,
Now, we’re all starin’ at her lookin’ stunned!

Chorus


She went from Pound Cake to Princess!
She used to belong in a Circus.
‘Cause once upon a time she was so elephantine,
Now she is Righteously Divine.

Verse Two

She used to be huge and I don’t mean tall.
She liked big portions, never small.
The Food Court found her guilty at the mall,
‘Cause she was always stuffed like a Butter Ball.
Voted “Most Likely to Explode,”
She really liked her pie a la mode.
Her favorite subject was Cafeteria,
So every year she covered more area.
We thought she had her own gravitational pull,
The way food disappeared down her big Black Hole.

Chorus

She went from Pound Cake to Princess!
She used to belong in a Circus.
‘Cause once upon a time she was so elephantine,
Now she is Righteously Divine.


Verse Three

She tried out for Cheerleader, but always failed,
‘Cause her every jump pegged the Richter Scale.
No one ever told her, “Put some meat on them bones.”
‘Cause she was always wolfin’ down them ice cream cones.
But she went from Dairy Queen to Beauty Queen.
Damndest thing I’ve ever seen.
She used to be a cow, boy - a real huge heifer.
Now, she could be in Playboy for Mr. Hugh Hefner.
Her thighs used to look like Jello a’movin’,
Now they look like J. Lo a’groovin’.


Verse Four

In my glory days she dreamed we’d be bride and groom.
I said not unless ya’ go to the de-juicing room.
But right now I’m fallin’ under her spell.
Who knew the Lap Band worked so well.
But when this football star goes to make a pass,
She looks at my comb-over like I’m an ass.
I guess I threw an Incomplete.
And now the shoes is on the other feet.
I shouldn’t of been so mean when she was fat,
‘Cause now she ain’t gonna give me a piece ‘a’ that!

Outro

She went from Pound Cake to Princess!
And now a decade later that ol’ Pound Caker,
She is a real Heartbreaker!!!











 
 



                                       ©William Smith Keane 2012 All Rights Reserved