Keep It Dumb

Satirical Country tune about our tabloid nation and its dumbbell fixation.





Intro

So I say - Keep it dumb, Keep it dumb, Keep it dumb...

Verse One

I ain't never been a book reader;  too many pages to turn.
And as far as mathematics, too much mental gymnastics,
I ain't got no brain cells to burn.
I never got straight A's, I wasn't no teachers pet.
I like watchin' Wrestlemania - I got WWF's.
I dropped out of school for the University of Barstool.
I didn't waste my time gettin' knowledge,
I headed straight to Jim Beam college.
But I sure as hell ain't nobody's fool.
'Cause them Harvard suits at AIG,
Got bailed out by rednecks like me.
'Cause I keep it dumb.  'Cause I keep it dumb!

Chorus

I keep it dumb, I keep it dumb.
I keep it dumb, I keep it dumb.
My brainstems pretty numb.
I can barely walk and chew gum.
But I'm the Einstein of "have a good time!"
Beause I keep it dumb!

Verse Two
I like Reality Show train wrecks,
Where they all need brain checks.
Monster Truck races and Judge Judy cases,
And Springer with his trailer park rejects.
I'm the poster boy for stupidy.
My TV's never tuned to Jeopardy.
The questions to the answers, I don't know them.
But I don't worry about high-brow scrutiny.
I just claim moron immunity.
I don't care if "the tribe has spoken."
My I.Q.'s below room temperature.
No fancy words in my vocabular.
Because I keep it dumb.  Because I keep it dumb!

Chorus

I keep it dumb, I keep it dumb.
I keep it dumb, I keep it dumb.
My brainstems pretty numb.
I can barely walk and chew gum.
But I'm the Einstein of "have a good time!"
Beause I keep it dumb!


Bridge

My noggin's not in gear, that's certifiable.
It's always stuck in American Idol.
I never been to an institution of higher learnin'.
I make Gilligan look like a brain surgeon.
But if Washington Politicians can have the smarts of Paris Hilton,
Then just gimme my NASCAR and a honky-tonk bar,
And Keep It Dumb!

Verse Three

In this great tabloid nation,
We got a dumb bell fixation.
Who needs graduation,
Celebrate mental masturbation,
And you can be a Youtube sensation.
We got lip-sinkin' Mouseketeers with nothin' 'tween their ears,
Who get rich like Britney Spears.
We got rappers talkin' baby talk
Who live in cribs as big as city blocks.
Who says you can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear?
So, if you wanna be rich and famous,
You gotta act like an ignoramus.
Ya gotta Keep It Dumb.  Ya gotta KEEP IT DUMB!

Chorus
I keep it dumb, I keep it dumb.
I keep it dumb, I keep it dumb.
My brainstems pretty numb.
I can barely walk and chew gum.
But I'm the Einstein of "have a good time!"
Beause I keep it dumb!


"Cause he Keeps It Dumb.


"Cause I Keep It Dumb.


"Cause he Keeps It Dumb.


"Cause I Keep It Dumb!















©William Smith Keane 2010 All Rights Reserved